Ignored Call

I got a bit of a semi-shock after my nap just now. My phone rang and guess who it was….”Bad Guy”. Or as some might know him, XiaoLong. I have no idea why he was calling, and can’t say that I’m interested either. From his call though I can see that he didn’t change his number…which also means he still lives in Tianjin (people enerally change numbers when they move to new cities here). Thank goodness I haven’t ran into him at one of my haunts, because I can just imagine the awkward forced politeness, haha.

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“Awkward” First Date?

I put awkward in quotations because it wasn’t really awkward to me, but my sister Stephanie referred to it as such in her blog post, haha. But first let me describe how I met this guy (I swear my life should be a sitcom….some of the things that happen people).

We met at Helen’s a few months ago while we were both grabbing drinks at the bar. He seemed nice enough, nice eyes, tall, and Canadian so I stopped and talked with him for a bit. Nothing serious of course but we made light conversation. I found out that his name is Irish (Kieran), I’m pretty sure he said his family background is Irish as well, and that he goes to Nankai. Other than that we had no contact until early May, when we met at the club. I was pretty tipsy at that point and saw someone who looked manly (I kind of have gotten sick of the small statures of Asian men, not completely but I definitely like them more muscular now as a result)…you all know what that meant. I saw him approaching me for a dance but I stopped him and asked, “Do you belong to Nastya (my Russian girl friend)?” This felt like a perfectly normal question at the time because I wasn’t sure if she was making eyes at him or not. Well apparently not because he gave me a confused face, I shrugged, turned around, and kept dancing. We danced for a few songs and in my typical fashion I decided that I wanted to dance on stage (when I dance I don’t care if it’s with others or by myself, I do whatever I want basically). After a few more songs I decided I wanted to dance with someone again, but I think the alcohol settled in and I felt drunker than before….so (embarrassingly) I got stuck…between two guys? Why do I always end up that way? So I saw two guys, both white, tall, brown haired looking at me as if they expected a dance, and I couldn’t remember which one was which, I have morals! I couldn’t grind on one guy, and then grind on another in the first guy’s face. So I danced with none of them, haha. Luckily Kieran got my number before I went off and he texted me the next day. We talked for a couple of days, then nothing until 2 weeks ago, when he asked if I wanted to go out for coffee. I was very apprehensive. I’ve really only ever done the school girl dating, where you meet each other in class, or the halls, or through mutual friends, hang out in a group, and then move into asking each other out privately. This will sound silly, but I felt like this would be a “grown-up” date…does this make sense to anyone else?!

Eventually I said yes, but it changed into a meet at Helen’s kind of date. So I worked, sang KTV and had lunch with my family and friends, and then got dolled up to go to Helen’s. I wasn’t sure what to expect but he sure made it into a date-date. Like I sat next to him, we talked almost exclusively the whole night, and he bought almost all of my drinks (I had to buy one to show him that I wasn’t a leech haha). He was really nice and if I were staying in China longer I would definitely consider dating him (he’s staying for another year). Interesting things about him: He’s studied abroad in 5 different countries, knows six languages (Chinese being his sixth), has a Master’s Degree from the best economics university in England, and was nice. From this list though, you guys can probably tell a glaring fact in what separated us…that’s right, age! He’s 29, I honestly wasn’t freaked out when I realized that but after pondering the fact I can see where it might create a problem. I was even shy about flirting with him because he was so mature…not like the boys that I’m used to. It was hilarious watching him try to fish around for my age, he was really smart about it though. He asked about my first experience in China, how old I was then, and then a few minutes later he asked what year I came in on….very smart indeed. He took it in stride though, I think what made him not pursue further dates was the fact that I am leaving in two weeks. It’s a bumer but this is how my life is, whenever I’m leaving to go somewhere a nice boy comes around who wants more. I think it has to do with my karma 😛

Sidenote: I think Stephanie called it awkward because there was another boy there who I have had a long-term flirting relationship with…in the same room that night. Whenever Kieran would get up to get drinks or go to the bathroom, my friend would come by and take his seat, asking if I needed rescuing. Also, whenever Kieran was there, my friend would come over and touch me on my neck and shoulders…haha, yeah that does count as awkward now that I think of it. Oh well, overall I had a fun night and now I have dipped my toes back into the cold, cold river of love!

I Give Up

Wow , I just received news that leaves me fuming. As we all know, Brandon is the waiter at my favorite haunt, Helen’s. When he first arrived a few months ago we were pretty flirty, and by flirty I mean it was a two way street. Last month, a week after I decided to let him go and stop crushing on him, Brandon and my friend Alex decided to hang out in Beijing one weekend. Brandon usually works weekends, but he took that one off because a friend from his hometown wanted to see the Forbidden Palace. I was against the idea, I didn’t want to spend more time with the guy I was trying to distance myself from. But he and Alex talked me into it, Brandon wanted to go clubbing for the first time in his life and even wanted to get tipsy beforehand….of course I couldn’t resist. Well, when Alex and I arrived in Beijing the next day, Brandon was acting shady and started making excuses about why he couldn’t hang out with us. I was so mad at him then, but it just helped me along the whole “don’t like him anymore” phase I was going through. So we went out anyways, had a bunch of free drinks and had a grand old time. The week after the debacle Brandon tried to make it up to me with free drinks and half-off entrees and eventually I forgave him. It was all in the past….until today when I found out why he wouldn’t hang out with us.

That new girlfriend of his that I mentioned in my last post, she was a friend of his before (they both grew up in HuBei province)and knows about the supposed “relationship” between Brandon and I. Apparently, she’s a jealous harpy and forbade him from hanging out with us, and by us I mean ME, in Beijing. Nothing happened between the two of us, so I don’t even know why Brandon had to tell her about me, it’s so confusingly annoying. I’m sick and tired of girls thinking I will steal their men, when I know a guy has a girlfriend he is off limits to me. I wonder if I somehow scream whore despite this fact, because all of my guy friends (except the gay ones) have girlfriends who basically hate me. When I know a guy has a girlfriend he drops off my radar so it doesn’t even need to be a situation. At least in this Hu Bei girl’s defense I actually was trying to make a move on her man….granted it was before he was her man so I feel no guilt.

At this point, I am beyond over Brandon, from now on he is getting the cold, neutrally polite shoulder granted to any waiter in my presence. I really need to get some fresh blood around here….

St. Paddy’s Day

Happy Belated St. Patrick’s Day!

I hope that you all had a good time; I know I did, though I am still recovering from my night out, haha. This year was my first legal St. Patrick’s Day (21 and everything), and this year it fell on a Saturday. What a wonderful coincidence. I know if I were still in Boston it would’ve too crazy to describe. BUT this year I got to celebrate it here… I was disappointed to discover that Chinese people have never even heard of this holiday…let alone celebrate it. So my group of foreign friends and I had to bring the American/Irish holiday spirit. Everyone wore something green (to avoid the pinches) and we hit all of our Chinese friends who had the misfortune of going to Helen’s in inappropriate attire (aka no green). I’m sure they will never forget another St. Patrick’s Day in this lifetime~ Actually I don’t own anything cute and green, so I brought along a leprechaun who remained perched on my shoulder all night. My friend’s mom sent it in a care package and he was too ashamed to wear him out, being the shameless crazy that I am, I had no such qualms. It was adorable; he had curly red hair, green clothes sprinkled with four leaf clovers, and a cup of beer. His eyes also had a hazy drunk look to them, I called him McDuffy.

We got to Helen’s around 8pm, ate and hung out until 10pm, and then got a bottle of Russian vodka. We played card games and drank until everyone felt tipsy…everyone that is, except me. Warning, don’t judge me: I have the alcohol tolerance level of a football playing frat boy. It’s horrendous, so after multiple shots and glasses of vodka (lots of them), I went to the bar and told my friend to give me the strongest stuff they had. I forget what it was called but it was 70% and I did three small glasses of it, and had a mojito afterwards just to be sure. FINALLY, I felt ready to go dancing, haha. We all piled into three cabs,  got to Xitang (basically the only good dance club in Tianjin), and it kind of becomes a blur after that. Not because I blacked out, but because I stopped paying attention and just danced. I’m an equal opportunity dancer, I danced with everyone and everywhere haha. We stayed there until a little after 3 and stepped outside for a breather. A random guy came up to me and said, “You’re a great dancer” I’m almost 100% certain that I didn’t dance with him, so he just probably saw my craziness from afar. After a while we grabbed our bags and coats and walked out into a winter wonderland. Yes, it snowed for the first time this winter that night. We all turned into big kids, running around and shoving snow down each other’s shirts and jackets. Running away from one of my friends I slipped and fell in a major way, my knee is still sore and bruised, haha. It was a really fun night.

One bad note though: My crush on Brandon has diminished greatly over the weeks, but I still felt an attraction of sorts. Ever since last week his flirting has practically ceased and I wondered why, well it’s because he has a new, long distance girlfriend. She’s from his hometown and I am so over him now….crusty savage. He didn’t even have the balls to tell me himself, a mutual friend of ours did and when I asked him about it all he had to say was, “Who told you?” Like it was supposed to be some kind of secret. Honestly, I don’t understand the thinking process of guys. Thank goodness I stopped crushing on him earlier than St. Patrick’s Day or that would have ruined my night, haha.

Men…

…the bane of my existence.

Last night had to be one of the funniest ones in Helen’s, Brandon and I have been getting pretty awkward around each other, I don’t even know why. Alex and I headed over around 10 so I could grab a salad (Helen’s salads are the best in Tianjin, hands down) and met up with Avi, Moon, Li Jun You, Mustapha (an African guy raised in India), and some of their friends. Since there were too many of us, we split tables and sat somewhere else. I ate my salad happily and drank a beer (something I shouldn’t have done but Brandon handed me a free one so I couldn’t resist). We talked for a while, then Avi went to Moon and the other’s table for a while, when he came back I discovered they had drinks and I wanted to see about getting some free ones so I headed over. Moon was being strangely forward with the arm around my shoulder right from the get-go, I was confused but understood after I discovered that his Chinese friend was a player, believe it or not, his English name is Dance. So dance and I played a Chinese drinking game that involves dice called ShaiZi, he started asking me what I thought of Chinese boys and once Moon went to the bathroom asked if I had a boyfriend. Of course I answered no, and then hinted that I’m a sucker for vodka, I expected just a shot of it or a glass, but no… the guy comes back with an entire bottle. I felt so touched, haha. Moon was giving me the stank eye but what is a girl to do, refuse vodka? I think not.

After a few too many shots, I felt less awkward about talking with Brandon, so we talked for a bit, and I even forced him to speak English with me. His English is so adorable; also I took advantage of the situation and asked him what kind of girls he likes…his answer made me SO mad. He likes girls who are “calm” and get him. Ok, the second part is a no-brainer, but what the heck is a “calm” girl, obviously it’s the opposite of me, loud and crazy Marsha. I walked away a bit angry and went back to Dance and Moon’s table (gosh saying their names together are so funny), I then cried out my woes to Moon. Not literally cried but I was sad, plus Moon found out about my wanting to rape Brandon thing a few days ago thanks to Li Jun You, so he made a good confidante. At least I thought so before, but sometimes I forget that he likes me, so he took the opportunity “give me his shoulder” and kept talking about how great I am and that I would find someone better. He definitely meant himself, but I was too tipsy to care. I also remember him saying things like, “Crushes and boyfriends come and go but friends *pointed to himself* are forever”. Omg this guy is too funny. He also offered to take me on a vacation in two weeks, to another province in China. Just to tour around and he would pay for everything….I love touring, and the thought made my college budget mind sing, but honestly I have to turn him down. That would just be too cruel. It’s one thing to lead a guy on for drinks, but to do it for a vacation is on a whole other level.

Also, I’m pretty sure he’s mad at me now, because Brandon and I sat talking in a corner for over an hour at the end of the night. Nothing romantic happened, I decided I will just be his friend since I’m not “calm” enough for him. He asked me what kind of guys I like and I told him, honestly my list is not that hard, I just want someone taller than me, nice, smart, funny, and cute. He also offered to show me around his school sometime…let’s see if he actually follows through with that, the prick…opps! I guess I am a little angry still, but the resentment will go away I’m sure. Moon came over at some point and tried to cockblock but I sent him away (there was nothing to block, haha). Oh, I just remembered, Dancer asked if I wanted to “go home” with him…the kid’s funny, I gave no indication of more than friendship so of course I said no. He’s pretty harmless though so we exchanged numbers and I said we could be friends. All in all, my heart got broken last night, but it’s ok, I need to stop with the guys anyways, boys bring nothing but trouble!

Creeper Alert

Creeper Alert: Three nights ago, my good friend Alex came back from his 10 day trip to Japan, so of course we celebrated with a trip to Helen’s. It was a hilarious night because he got pretty wasted, it was also his 21st birthday celebration since he didn’t celebrate it right in Japan (no drinking). Percy was there also, he’s the Chinese frined of mine who studied in Australia and has really cool eyes, they remind me of TOP from Big Bang. Everyone comments on them, even Asians, haha. I got over being mad at him, he told Alex that I’m a bad kisser, when in actuality HE was the bad kisser, he attacked me with his tongue and so I just stood there (in shock)! I must defend my honor, haha. But I digress, about the creeper: the whole time we were in Helen’s I kept seeing a tall, black man looking at me from the corner. I wasn’t sure, because it was dark the first time I met him, but I was pretty sure it was Biggy. An American (or wherever he’s from) who hit on me two months ago in Xitang. After that night I never encouraged him, actually I barely “encouraged” him that night, just smiled and politely answered questions. Well I must be a vixen because he kept calling and texting after that, I even made Avi pick up one time to scare him. I hoped he wouldn’t come up to me, men have pride right? But he approached me at the bar and said, “Well, don’t you look familiar?” I looked right back at him and said, “Really? Because I don’t think we’ve met”. A normal guy would have left insulted, but he stayed the course. At the end of the night he got my number (again!) and asked me when I would be free, I gave a vague answer and told him to call me. He said, “But you won’t pick up”….If he knows I won’t pick up then why bother asking?!? Did he think he could manhandle me into liking him? Haha, and surely the next day he called and texted. Why do the ones I would never like like me?

Good Night Out

Finally the semester is going to start!

Winter vacation in China is very different than the one’s I experienced in America. Usually vacation means more people out clubbing, drinking, or doing anything….well not in Tianjin it doesn’t. A lot of the Nankai students are “out-of-state” so once break hit there was a great wave of young folk who left, not to mention all of these holidays during the break are family holidays. So everyone holed up at home and didn’t go out to play. The clubs and bars had been dead for a month, but starting yesterday, things picked back up again! It must be because school starts on Monday….Anyways I met some friends for lunch at the commercial district, Bin Jiang Dao. It was surprisingly cold, and I took forever to get there, so as an apology (they looked so pathetically cold!) I paid for the meal. I’m so sweet right? Haha. Then met up with Moon and some other friends later for dinner. Again I had some apologizing to do (gosh, why is apologizing so expensive?), I ditched Moon twice in a row, one day being on Valentine’s Day (how was I supposed to guess that he wanted to hang out?) so I promised him a meal. Oh, my pocket hurts, I run through cash here like it’s Monopoly money.

Prior to dinner though, I received surprise phone call…it was Brandon. He only asked me, “Aren’t you coming out tonight (to Helen’s)?” I screamed in joy because that meant he was back. So after dinner, we went over to Helen’s and I saw the love of my life again, *sigh* he is just as dreamy as ever. I didn’t flirt too hardcore with him because I didn’t want to appear too eager, but if he would only give me an hour’s time and a private place…..but I digress. Oh, before I forget, Moon said something that REALLY pissed me off, what a jerk face. He looked at me all seriously and said, “You know, if you were thinner you would be really beautiful/sexy”……Excuse me, WHAT?! Then he ogled my boobs. Wow, writing about this just makes me mad again, I made him buy me a drink and as I got tipsy I forgot I was mad at him, but now I remember…..I’m so gonna make him pay for that! Just because he wants me and won’t get me doesn’t mean he can be a jerk off. Whatever, Brandon’s hug at the end of the night sustained me and kept me from doing vengeance. I can’t wait to try and work my wiles out on Brandon some more, he doesn’t know it yet but we are soulmates~

After Helen’s, we took a trip to Xitang. Like everywhere else, Xitang had been disappointingly empty for the month, but yesterday it was packed and so much fun. Every time I turned a corner, I ran into old friends/acquaintances, I loved having that feeling again. One person I ran into was this cute Russian guy I met last week, but he was trying to hit on  this butter face Chinese girl all night (Eww). Another bonus of the night, though, was that I kept getting free drinks from a fabulous, gay Chinese man. He was a great dancer AND had nipple rings; it doesn’t get any better than that, right? We danced until 5 am, then Moon and Li Jun You (my Korean friend with perfect Chinese) abducted me and forced me back to their apartment complex, we watched a terrible Korean “horror” movie. I must admit, I am impressed with myself, the movie only had Chinese subtitles and I still followed along with no problem….not bad for a drunk viewing, haha. Then I crashed on Li Jun You’s extra bed until 12 in the afternoon, and ran back home to shower and catch a movie with some Chinese friends who are back in town. I originally planned to go out tonight too, it’s a night of guaranteed free drinks and great music, but Mother Nature had other plans. I wonder why woman are so cursed, not only do we have to bare the children, but every month (just for kicks) we experience cramping pains in our midsections….don’t get me started on the bloating. Oh the joy of being a woman!

 

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